Updated: Apr 24, 2022
OK, you're divorced. WTF now? Enter Rob Roseman of wtfdivorce.com. When Rob's own world was turned upside down by divorce in 2020 and he started his search for resources to help him through it all. Now his website, IG page @wtfdivorce and his own podcast offer a steady stream of high quality resources to help you date better, co-parent smoother, and thrive in your new life after divorce.
In this episode of Split. The After Ever After Podcast, Jennifer Sanders and I talk to Rob about his own experience with divorce and how men may experience divorce differently. Rob talks about dating as a single Dad, communicating with your ex, and the ongoing challenges of parenting.
Rob Roseman For a lot of reasons we quickly do go to dating because I think we need like an ego validation that somebody still wants us or finds us hot and attractive. And there is the, we want to hook up component, but I think bigger than all of that is find a connection and we don't really know where else to look for it because we're not as good at making friends or our friends are married.
I think women have better foundational relationships. Another reason guys quickly get into relationships is because let's be honest - it's easier to parent with a partner.
Jennifer Sanders What I often see with clients in mediation is that, again, when we're in traditional roles, the woman is sort of, you know, critical and like, "see, he's not helping, he doesn't know how to do it!", but he just hasn't ever had that opportunity before, or wasn't expected to before. Do you have any sort of advice or tips for how someone could be a help to their co-parent in that situation or what kind of resources that dad could be using? Because it is a really tough spot. Many dads want to parent and they want to parent well.
Rob Roseman I think there is something to be said for: let us figure it out. And I think that that's a thing in marriage too. Moms should really try to avoid becoming overly involved and like, "did you do this?" or "did you do that?" Ask yourself: Do I need to FaceTime all the time? Sometimes when my ex wife calls I'm just like, "it's eight o'clock I've got them in bed, please. I know you want to talk to them, but like, they're going to start wanting mommy". So, I think there's a balance between letting guys just have some space to figure it out because we can actually figure it out and not depend on mom, you know, interjecting.